**This post contains sexual content that may not be suitable for all readers!
Proverbs 31:2-3
I warned that last weeks session was somewhat boring and, indeed it was! Boring but necessary, it set our base for Lemuel being Solomon and the queen his mother, Bathsheba.
But, don’t fret. If last weeks session was boring this weeks session won’t be! A little uncomfortable maybe, but boring..not a chance! Let’s start right off with a look at scripture
What, my son? and what, the son of my womb? and what, the son of my vows? Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.
Proverbs 31:2-3 KJV
I wonder if Solomon and Bathsheba squirmed during this conversation? After all, how many grown men get advice on sexual matters from their mother? Probably not many, and maybe that needs to change! In case you wondered the “strength” and “ways” Bathsheba is referencing above are definitely sexually related and I admire Bathsheba’s willingness to go there. She not only went there but she went there intently. Three times she uses the phrase “what my son”. This is an indicator that she means business! She is emphatically wanting him to listen and heed her words.
Lets look at the same scripture above in the Message translation for a more modern rendering of Bathsheba’s ancient words,
“Oh, son of mine, what can you be thinking of! Child whom I bore! The son I dedicated to God! Don’t dissipate your virility on fortune-hunting women, promiscuous women who shipwreck leaders.
Proverbs 31:2-3, The Message
Just to be clear, Bathsheba isn’t against a marriage! She is advising her son against his own virility. His lust and desire for promiscuous sexual activity. She’s telling Solomon that if he gets hung up in his own desires he will shipwreck his life. It will end up broken!!!
If ever a woman knew that a King’s lust could be his downfall it was Bathsheba! After all, her own adulterous affair with King David (although we don’t know the extent of her liability or willingness to enter the affair) had lead to the murder of her first husband and the death of her first child.
Bathsheba was a momma who wanted to save her son from himself. She wasn’t afraid to discuss topics that could make a person squirm!
I believe that Bible study is worthless if you don’t apply it’s principles to your life! Even if it’s principles are uncomfortable. Maybe ESPECIALLY if it’s principles are uncomfortable!
Nothing makes a parent or child squirm more than discussion about sexual things but I suspect most of us do good with the basics. Saving “it” for marriage, STD’s, how to protect yourself if you choose not to save “it” for marriage.
But, just a normal run of the mill sex talk isn’t what Bathsheba was having with her son.
Bathsheba was talking about something much deeper! Something Destructive.
Young Solomon could have any woman he wanted at any place and time. That lustful desire could easily upend a man, leaving him weak of mind.
Since our young people aren’t reigning monarchs they can’t have sex anytime they want it but they can access pornography with frightening ease. It’s the sort of thing Bathsheba was talking about! A form of sexuality that can become obsessive to a human, controlling them and shipwreck their life.
Just as Solomon had a ready supply of women at his beck n call, our children today have pornography available at the touch of a finger. THe search for pornography no longer involves going to the “private section” at a video store!
It’s easily accessed on phones and computers. It’s incredibly private (read, easily hidden) and a lot of it is free. Yet, much like the women Bathsheba spoke of it has it’s price! Sexual sin always does.
Our society has a tendency to blow off the watching of pornography saying things like, “boys will be boys and they have to find a release for their “urges” somewhere. They also believe females would never watch porn, how mislead all of these beliefs are!
Pornography is nothing more than an intensely addictive money making venture.
Check out these statistics from Focus on the Family,
Approximately 11,000 “adult films” are released annually
The porn industry makes $2.84 billion/yr over the internet–the industry overall is estimated to make between $57-100 billion/yr
The most searched for term on the internet is “sex”
87% of university students say they had sex over webcams or phone
Huerta, Danny MSW, LCSW, LSSW. How Pornography Affects the Teen Brain. www.focusonthefamily.com, 4 August 2018
Sound much like Bathshebas woman who is only after Solomaon for gain? The porn industry takes its delight in enslaving young people to their own money making benefit.
An Ugly Picture
Still don’t think Porn use is life altering? Check out the effects of porn on the brain,
Pornography and sexual fantasy is progressive
Pornography and sexual fantasy is addictive and unfulfilling
Pornography and sexual fantasy turns users into consumers of people
Healthy relationships become impossible as long as pornography and sexual fantasies are present.
Depression is almost inevitable for porn users
Pornography and sexual fantasy stunts brain growth.
Huerta, Danny MSW, LCSW, LSSW. How Pornography Affects a Teen Brain. www.focusonthefamily.com, 14, August 2018
This list of effects paints an ugly picture. Uncontrolled lust that is fueled by pornography use makes the user more and more dependent upon it. It never satisfies but leads to continual and deeper need of the stimulus, porn. Pornography teaches the user that it’s okay to toss aside one human being in favor of another to meet their desires. Pornography also leads to difficulty in healthy relationships
“Because it rewires your brain, pornography makes it hard to have a healthy, long-term relationship with the opposite sex. Love becomes conditional-about “me” instead of “us” It makes attachment [to a human] very difficult. Oxytocin, the bonding hormone, is released in response to relationship AND when a person is having a sexual experience. When teens view pornography they bond with an illusion, not a person. emphasis mine
Hulberta, Danny MSW, LCSW, LSSW. How Pornography Affects a Teen Brain. www.focusonthe family.com August 4, 2018
Basically, pornography makes people unable to bond correctly with humans in a normal relationship due to their unnatural relationship with pornography. The final fact by Huerta, that pornography stunts brain growth should be especially concerning to parents.
Here’s what he says,
“We naturally tend toward whatever gives us immediate pleasure and pornography trains the brain to pursue explicit content at ANY COST. Both Scripture and science confirm that an essential ingredient of wisdom is self-control. True freedom is found in self-control not self-indulgence.” emphasis mine
Huerta, Danny MSW, LCSW, LSSW. How Pornography Affects a Teen Brain. www.focusonthefamily.com, 14, August 2018
We just read that Bathsheba warned Solomon, who, it could be argued, had a whole harem of living pornography, to avoid fortune-hunting promiscuous women because they shipwreck leaders
Maybe this look at the effects of pornography explains her concern! Constant promiscuous sexual activity, be it in a harem or on the computer screen, leads to downfall.
So, mom’s and dad’s, I’m going to suggest that we become like Bathsheba!
See the danger! See that our society, which promotes Pornography as safe and acceptable, is lying!
Pornography is nothing more than the women Bathsheba tried to warn Solomon about, set only on making money. Wrecking lives psychologically and physically in the process.
Rise to the challenge today, talk openly and honestly to your children about the danger of uncontrolled lust and pornography. Be willing to squirm a little in your important conversations. It could save your little King (or Queen) from becoming ship-wrecked!
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